


Five Times James Potter Didn't Understand, and One Time He Did

by Trex_patronus



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 5+1 Things, Afterlife, Angst, Baby Harry, Canon Compliant, F/M, Gen, James Potter and Lily Evans Potter's Wedding, James Potter is a Good Friend, Remus Lupin Needs a Hug, Werewolf Discrimination, angst with a happy-ish enging, the tags are a hogwarts trainwreck because it's 1am
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:28:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28446912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trex_patronus/pseuds/Trex_patronus
Summary: I decided to write a 5+1 one-shot at 11, because I'm like that.  I own nothing, the universe belongs to JKR.  Please enjoy!
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Remus Lupin & James Potter, Remus Lupin & Teddy Lupin & Nymphadora Tonks, Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29





	Five Times James Potter Didn't Understand, and One Time He Did

December 12, 1973

Remus Lupin was so tired. December full moons were awful, the Shack was so cold when he woke up. He was laying in the hospital wing, and his friends were telling him that they were gonna find a way to help. Remus laughed at that. “No one’s found a cure, yet. And we’re third-years, I doubt we’ll figure it out.”

“Still though. We can try.” His friend James Potter said. “Besides, we don’t have to fix it...maybe we can just make it a bit more bearable for you.” It was nice of him to suggest, but Remus had tried everything in both Madam Pomfrey’s and Slughorn’s supplies. Nothing could make it more bearable. James looked hopeful though. “Right?” He asked.

“It’s nice of you.” Remus told him. “But I don’t think you quite understand what it’s like. _Nothing_ can make it more bearable.”

June 20, 1976

“So _why_ are you avoiding McGonagall again?” James asked.

Remus sighed. “Because she wants me to go to some stupid career advice meeting.”

“Oh, that.” James brushed it aside with a gesture of his hand, as they walked across the courtyard. “It’s not that big of a deal, Moons, everyone’s gotta do it.”

“Well, I don’t see why _everyone’s_ got to.” Remus complained. He really did _not_ want to go to his career advice meeting.

“C’mon mate, it’s just Minnie.” James joked. “She _loves_ you!” He wasn’t wrong, Remus got on well enough with McGonagall. She was strict though in a pushing-you-to-your-potential kind of way, which was the last thing Remus wanted. “Sirius says it’s no big deal, she just lays out your career prospects for you, based on your grades and stuff, and asks what you want to do.”

“What if a student doesn’t have any career prospects?” Remus suggested, trying to sound casual.

James laughed. “Mate, are you serious?” James waved his hand, as if to silence Remus, who hadn’t even tried to say anything. “Yeah, yeah, I know, he’s in Divs with Pete, but Rem, you’ve got to be kidding me! You’ll have more career prospects than anyone, have you seen your grades. I mean, you could _teach_ defense if you wanted, jinx notwithstanding.”

Remus blushed. He knew he could never teach, being what he was. He’d always dreamed of it though, specifically Defense Against the Dark Arts. A small, selfish part of him wanted to do it, but he knew it wouldn’t be safe for the students. And an even smaller, outlandishly hopeful part of him wanted to be the one to break the curse. He didn’t say any of this to James though. He just said “Maybe,” James gave him a slight nudge in the ribs, that was probably supposed to be encouraging. “But there are other things in my way.”

“What?” James asked. Remus raised his eyebrows, and James got the message. “Oh, that.” Remus rolled his eyes. Yes, _that._ “Well, that’s just a little problem, I’m sure you can figure it out.”

“A little problem?” Remus asked, incredulous. “A little problem? My…” he lowered his voice “ _lycanthropy_ is a little problem?” James nodded. “Forget it, James, you don’t understand.”

Remus quickened his pace, hoping James would take a hint, when he heard James from behind him. “Granted, it’s a bit furrier than most little problems, but...hey! Hey, Moony, wait up!” Remus sighed internally as James hurried to catch up with him.

July 3, 1978

“What’s this about a werewolf commun?” James was pacing back and forth across Remus’ bedroom as he packed up his rucksack. “The plan was to fight in the Order together! All four of us!”

“Yeah, well, that was _before_. Things have changed.” Remus was folding his school sweaters neatly into a stack.

“Don’t tell me you’re talking about that article.” Remus didn’t answer. “None of that was backed by science, it was just fear-mongering.”

“Yes,” Remus sighed, as he moved on to his muggle sweaters. “But the article itself painted a target on my back. You four are safer if I’m not around.”

“So, what, you’re just gonna cut us off?” James asked. He seemed rather offended.

“Course not.” Remus replied, pausing to pick lint off of a sweater. A fruitless task, really, but a distraction. “I’ll write.”

“You’re being stupid, and you know it.” Remus had to admit, James might be right. “Give it up, will you? You’re the best in our year at defense, we both know we’re all safer with you here.”

Remus sighed and threw the sweater on his bed. “Fine.”

“Thank you!” James muttered, mock-irritated. Remus could tell he was really relieved. He didn’t realize how worried his idea had made James. “C’mere, bring it in.” James pulled Remus up against him, and squeezed with everything in him, which, for James, was a lot. He was awfully strong from playing quidditch. “Honestly, sometimes I don’t understand where you get these ideas.” James muttered into Remus’ shoulder.

October 26, 1979

Remus sat down at the table across from James, after delivering his toast. It had been fairly heartfelt, but like everyone in the wedding party, he hadn’t missed the chance to rib James a bit for chasing Lily in school.

James shot a smirk his way. “Very funny, Moony. Just wait till your wedding.”

Remus nearly spat out the champagne he’d just sipped. “My what?!” He asked.

“Your wedding.” Remus was about to protest, but apparently James was onto him. “Oh, don’t be like that, you know it’ll happen sooner or later.” He said.

“I don’t know of any witches who’d be interested in someone like me.” Remus sighed

As usual, James brushed that aside with his hand. “She’ll come along. Sooner or later, someone will fall in love with you, and sooner or later, you’ll fall back.”

Remus had been privy to James and Lily’s relationship for two years now, but it was certainly more noticeable today. He’d seen the way they looked at each other, and he might have secretly wished he had someone like that in his life. He knew how impossible it was, though. “I think I’ve taken more than my fair share of people who don’t care about lycanthropy. If she’s really out there...someone else deserves her.”

“How on Earth do you figure that?” James asked, trying to disguise a snort, that might have been induced by the champagne, or just the general euphoria of the day.

Remus shrugged. “If you don’t get it, I don’t think I can explain it to you.”

July 31, 1981

Remus Lupin was in a hospital again, but for once he was alright with that. Not just used to it, but genuinely alright with it. Happy, even.

“He’s got your eyes, Lil.” James said for the eighth time that Remus had counted.

“Would you like to hold him, Rem?” Lily asked.

Remus was shocked, and pointed at his chest. “Me? No, I couldn’t, I-”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Lily cut him off. “C’mere.” She motioned with her head, and Remus complied. “Now, hold your hands like I am…”

Remus didn’t understand how Lily, or anyone for that matter, could trust him with their kid. He was...dangerous. Sure, it wasn't a full moon or anything, but...babies were fragile, and if he did anything to hurt Harry, who was only a few hours old, he’d never forgive himself. “Lily, I wouldn’t want to…” he began, but Lily cut him off, green eyes staring right into his.

“I trust you, Remus.” Remus nodded, and nervously held his hands the way Lily had hers. “That’s it.” She smiled at him. “Now, be ready, he’s a bit heavier than he looks.” She slowly passed him the baby, and adjusted his hands ever-so-slightly before letting go. “See? He likes you already. Just make sure you cradle his head, and…” Lily let out a yawn.

James leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. “Get some rest, love.” He whispered, but Lily was already asleep. Remus was still staring at the bundle in his arms in utter amazement. Harry’s eyes really were his mum’s, a bright, emerald green. And maybe he was just imagining it from the amount of times he’d seen it in Lily, but there seemed to be a certain fierceness behind them. He felt James’ presence over his shoulder. “You’d make a great dad, Moony.”

Remus chuckled. “Relax, Prongs, I’m just holding him.”

James smiled. “Yeah, but some day.”

“You flatter me, but you know I could never have kids. I’m too worried they’d end up like…” Remus trailed off, sure that James knew what he was getting at.

Apparently, he was wrong. “Like…?” James urged.

“Like me.” Remus finished.

“And would that be such a bad thing?” James asked. _Yes._ “You’re a great person!”

“Yeah, when I’m a person.” Remus muttered.

“Oh, you mean...well, I’m sure you could adopt.” James suggested.

Remus shrugged. He stared at the child in his hands. _Maybe someday…_ But he knew he couldn’t. “Even then,” he said, “They’d do a background check, or something. Besides, some parent I’d make. It’s the principle of the thing.”

“I think you’d make a great father.” James insisted.

Remus shook his head. “You just don’t get it, do you?”

The healer walked in then, and the conversation was almost forgotten. _Almost._

May 2, 1998

Remus woke up in a white room. He sat up, and blinked, several times. It was far too bright. Granted, Remus was used to waking up in bright, white rooms, but never had he felt so...painless. He squinted, and noticed a door. It was familiar, but he couldn’t quite place it. It opened a crack, and he saw a sliver of...something else familiar on the other side, before the view was impeded by a body. A body he hadn’t seen in seventeen years. “James?”

James started at the sound of his name. He’d been talking to someone behind him, and hadn’t noticed Remus. His head whipped around, and he stopped dead in his tracks. His face broke into a wide grin. “Remus! Pads, it’s Remus!” James’ face suddenly fell, as if something had occurred to him. “Oh. Oh no, oh Merlin no.”

Then another voice, equally familiar, but younger than the last time Remus had heard it. “Did you say Remus? He’s here? But that means…” The words trailed off as Sirius Black ran into the room. He smiled at Remus momentarily, before adopting the same sad look as James.

None of it made any sense to Remus. He’d just been…(why was it so hard to remember?)...at the battle. Son of a banshee, he’d just been at the battle! What was he doing here, with his friends? His _dead_ friends, nonetheless.

Oh.

“No.” He heard himself say. “I- I missed you guys, but...I can’t. I have to go back.”

James sighed. “Sorry mate. That’s not really an option.”

“It has to be an option! My wife, my _son,_ I can’t just…” While he was at a loss for words, another familiar face stuck her head in the door.

“Sirius, your cousin is here. Tonks, I mean, she…” Lily trailed off as she saw Remus. “Rem. It’s you.” She too, smiled, but just like the others, only for a short instant. “Oh no. Remus, your wife, she...well, she’s here.”

“No!” Remus shouted. “No, I have to go back! Where is she, where’s Dora? DORA! We have to go back! Teddy, he can’t…”

“I know, Remus.” James said. “I get it.”

“No, you don’t understand, James! I- I was fighting for him! I wanted to make things better for him, and now he won’t have Dora or I, and…” He trailed off, noticing the way James was looking at him. Oh. Now Remus felt really stupid. He looked down at the bed he was sitting on. It was familiar, and the brightness was fading, to make everything more visible. “I’m sorry, James.” He murmured. “I never should have...I...you do understand, probably more than I do. Sorry.”

James walked over, and sat down next to him. “Don’t stress it, Moony. What matters is, you and Tonks aren’t alone. LIly and I have been through this. Are still going through it, to some extent.” He felt James wrap an arm around his shoulders, but Remus continued staring at the blanket on the bed (his bed) as it came into focus against the brightness. “We get it. We understand.” Remus let out a small, half-hearted laugh, and watched as the blanket slowly became a bright crimson, and he realized exactly where he was.


End file.
